GitHub to Replace Pagan Monad with Christian Cross

Sebastian Carlos
2 min readAug 24, 2023

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San Francisco, CA — In a move that can only be described as #blessed, Github decided to change the monad, often associated with Neoplatonism, with the cross of Jesus Christ.

The monad on the issues button has sparked controversy, as some developers felt uneasy with its connection to paganism and functional programming.

Technical details

Plotinus (3rd century BC) believed in the existence of a Transcendental One, the ultimate source of all reality, beyond human comprehension. To reach a state of mystical union with it, one must undergo a process of recursion and purification from side-effects.

“The Transcendental One is just a monoid in the category of endofunctors. What’s the problem?” said functional programmer Ellis P. Max.

The Monad. First form.

GitHub’s decision received mixed reactions. Some developers argue that it infringes on their freedom of expression, while Github’s religious department (Tribunal del Santo Repositorio), sees it as a positive step towards salvation.

Closing thoughts

As with any change, there will always be those who resist.

But GitHub believes that this shift will ultimately create a more welcoming, diverse, equitable, inclusive, and sanctimonious environment for all developers.

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Sebastian Carlos
Sebastian Carlos

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